'OBJECT 309'

Now for the truth behind 'Object 309'.

After I sent 'Object 309' all the way from Egypt to our team here at "The Collection" for it's safe keeping, it was some how separated from a letter I wrote explaining the object's history. So when Dr Blofli received and opened it he had no idea what the object was.

O.K. let's get to the bottom of 'Object 309'. It is in fact a 'key'! That's right a 'key' and not any ordinary key, It's the oldest key in known history. I know this because I've spent the last 6 months in Egypt doing research on it. My knowledge of the key's existence started 4 years ago, when my uncle Professor Nunce a archaeologist for OEF (the Official Egyptologist Foundation) found a 'stone tablet' while excavating a archaeological site in Karbrillo, a small town on the out skirts of Cairo. Found inscribed on this 'stone tablet' was some of the oldest examples of hieroglyphs ever to be found. Experts say that the hieroglyphs date back before the year 3000BC. So abstract and hard to understand were these hieroglyphs, it took the world's best hieroglyphs experts three and half years to decipher their meaning and come up with this first ever translation.

The hieroglyphs spoke of a legend of a God. A God which fell from the sky in a roaring ball of fire. The God then presented the people who kneeled before him with an object. A small but fascinating object. A magical hypnotic object. The people then asked the god what it was and what it could do? The god then answered "It's the beginning, it can open the sky and the stars beyond" The God then told the people you must treasure this object for it is the key to the "meaning of life". On the the stone were many images, but it was believed that one of these was this key. So I began to research the images and one in particular stood out.

My research revealed that one particular image was of a key that appears in many ancient drawings and cravings of ancient time. It seems to have been a godlike icon that the early Egyptian people would worship daily. This worship is believed to be the earliest known beginnings of any religion. So seriously did the people take this icon, that it was high up on walls, table tops, you name it, it was every where. The key's form was made into jewelry, for instance necklaces and beads of worship. This affection for the key also lead the people to construct mammoth stone structures to house the key, these later became places of worship. They were the first manmade stone structures ever constructed and are believed to have carve the way for the more popular grand Pyramids that would follow years and years later.

So you can imagine my delight when I stumbled across, what I believe to be this very key, while shopping in a little curio shop in one of Cairo's dark back lanes. I immediately brought it and sent it back to RMIT for safekeeping and further analysis of its mythical powers. The rest is history